Date night doesn't need to break the bank

I hear tell the powers that be "They" say that a date  night is a must for a successful marriage.  Problem is "They" also say that financial issues are the number one cause of divorce.  So does this mean that only the rich have a chance for a successful marriage?  I mean seriously, who can afford to pay a sitter plus pay for dinner and a movie or something. It's an impossible task right?  I say NO!!!

Here's why!

Date nights do not have to entail an actual date.  I know I thought that was crazy too.  Rather this is time.  Time together, just the two of you.  Doesn't matter where or when, just take the time to be together and reconnect.

Dh and my weekdays are not good times for us. By the time he gets home from work, we have dinner, other commitments, etc, there isn't much more time for anything else, and our kids are grown!  Saturdays are our days.  Mainly Saturday mornings.  I will get up and make a pot of coffee.  Our bedroom windows face the back yard where we have a few bird feeders.  Granted the view isn't much in the winter, but come spring and summer it is wonderful.  Saturday mornings we lay around in bed drinking coffee and enjoy the view out our windows.  As the sun rises we have conversations about the kids, work, things we want to do around the house, and most of all memories.  We have a lot of those in the almost 24 years we've been married.  Today was no different.  We finally got our day actually started around 10:45.  I had some take and bake made up biscuits that I baked with some turkeu bacon zapped in the microwave.  Add some cheese and we had some awesome bacon cheddar biscuits in bed with our coffee.  Once we got started with our day it was off to drop off a mower to be repaired, and onto my  parents house to collect some cinder block she was giving us.  While there, and after we loaded the blocks,  we enjoyed a glass of tea on the back deck and talked more while watching her dog, Rusty,play.  She and her sister were out on the town.  We knew this going in.  Once home we shared lunch on the back porch and proceeded to unload the blocks from the truck.  Both of us agreed this was a great day.  We had fun, reconnected, but also accomplished a lot!   Now I know our kids are grown and if you have kids that are small this can be hard.  Hey, We've been there.  You find the time.  You may go to bed later or wake up early.  You may need to get a sitter, but go somewhere you can actually carry on a conversation.  Preferably free.

Our date night is always Saturday mornings for us.  Work comes later.  We're together.  Doesn't matter where, doesn't matter what we're doing. Just make that time with each other a priority.

Nuthin to do but wait.

So back in the first part of February, feeling the gardening monster creeping up, I started an experiment to see if starting my green bean and squash seeds early would help with controlling pests; i.e squash bugs, and bean beetles.  I had no idea green bean plants would grow as tall and as fast as these did.  As a result I had no choice but to go ahead and put them in the ground.  The squash seems to have fared well.  I put them in a few days ago, and covered them with straw.  Yesterday I took the straw off and they seemed OK.  The bean plants are too tall for that, so I have a plan for when the temps get too close to the border for beans.  I will tent some plastic over the row until the nearly freezing temps are gone.  We should get those temps, according to the weather man, this coming Friday and Sat.  Winters last gasp(I hope).  One thing I do know is to start my bean seeds indoors next year around the end of Feb or beginning of March.  Beginning of Feb might be a little too early (ya think?).  So I wait to see how they will do this year.

Everything else is doing fine.  Spinach, Beets, Tomatoes, and herbs are growing well.  My blueberry bushes are covered in blooms as are my peach trees.  I did manage to spray them this year before the buds opened.  One the blooms fall and the leaves are out, I will start a spray routine again..  Peaches are one fruit that seem impossible to not spray.  My blueberry and blackberry bushes are really effortless with the exception of picking them.

On the inside of the Homestead, we are still living on just one check.  Still moving forward so far in getting things paid off or fixed.  The car is paid off, which is a glorious feeling.  We are hopeful to have the truck in the shop sooner rather than later.  Not sure how long these hours at work are going to last.  I'm hopeful they last long enough for us to get the truck in the shop by the end of May.  After that I can go back to 20 hours a week with no problem.  We just want to get that truck fixed, but we are realistic too in that if we can't get the truck fixed, we can use that money toward the purchase of another vehicle.  Without a car payment.  That's the kicker.  We are too close.

So since we still are working towards these goals, I am really trying hard to not spend if I don't have too.  I am making sure I am using up the things in the fridge that need using up soon.  I had some yogurt(plain) that was needing to be used this morning and so I made low fat chocolate muffins and a batch of freezer bisuits.  Here are the recipes:

Freezer Biscuits (compliments of www.hillbillyhousewife.com)

6 cups Self Rising flour (you can use All purpose, just add 3 TBS Baking Powder and 3 tsp Salt)
1 cup shortening
2 cups milk(I used half yogurt and half milk)

Cut shortening into the flour then add the milk.  Stir just until mixed, then dump out on the counter and knead it into a ball of dough.  Cut out your biscuits and lay them out on a cookie sheet.  Place in the freezer.  Once frozen, store in a container.  Use as you need them.  To use take out the biscuits you need and lay them on a cookie sheet.  Bake in a 450 oven 10-15 min or until golden.  Good biscuits.


Low Fat Chocolate Muffins

1 1/2 cups flour
3/4 cups sugar
1/4 cocoa powder
2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp baking soda
1 egg
2/3 cup yogurt
1/2 cup milk
1/2 tsp vanilla

Mix all dry ingredients together until well incorporated.  Add the yogurt, egg, milk, and vanilla.  I use a whisk to mix it all together.  Pour into a muffin pan.  Bake 350 oven for 20 min.  Makes 12.

One down and One to go

I am happy to say Dh and I were able to pay off our car loan yesterday 5 mths early.  OH FORGET JUST HAPPY!  WEEEEEEEEEE!

 That leaves us with one credit card.  We haven't have debt this small since we were first married.  You would think our focus would be that credit card, but it can't be yet.  We pay about 25% over the minimum each month right now.  We will continue to do that because we have things taking precedence over that card.  After taxes are paid ( cause even though DH worked full time as just an LPN and I worked 20 hrs a week in registration the govt thinks we are in the top 10% of wage earners and therefore socked us good), our focus will turn to saving to repair Dh truck.  We hope to have it in the shop end of May.  Once the truck is fixed and we are back to a two car family, our focus will turn to this credit card.  The way we are accomplishing this is by budgeting only my husbands paycheck and living off of that.  That allows my paycheck to be used for debt payoff and saving for big things.  Sounds easy, but it does have its draw backs.  I have to live, i.e, cook, garden, bake, etc, like I am a full time stay at home mom.  Working 32 hours a week is going to make that difficult, but worth it in the long run.   Since it is a rainy day in my neck of the woods, my plan is to bake items to use in the next week or so.  Breads and cookies and maybe granola are on the list for today.  We may have to go out today so all of the items will be mixed this morning and baked tonight.

Can I please just throw in this little plea?  If you currently have no debt, keep it that way.  If you have debt, stop adding to it and pay it off.  My husband makes about 37,000 a year.  Out of that comes taxes (thank you very much), Health insurance, and Health Savings account. He brings home about 2200 a month.  It is amazing to me that we are able to make all of our bills and then some(tithing, savings,etc) on that small amount.  Because we no longer have massive debt!  Society doesn't have to buy into the philosophy of both parents having to work.  It is possible to be a one income family.  How bad do you want it.  What are you willing to sacrifice?  I have had people comment that we are so fortunate that I only work part time.  Fortune has nothing to do with it.  We chose to do without all the bells and whistles.  We don't have the latest gadgets, or great and lofty cable packages.  We eat out at a restaurant rarely.   Movies at the theater are events.  I shop at thrift stores or clearance, etc or sew.  I cut mine and my sons hair.  My point is we have given up a lot of things to have this ability.  I tell people we chose poverty.  But in the end I feel like we are blessed.  I miss nothing.  I know not all situations are like ours.  I know there are single parents, wives who work to provide income when their husband can't, or situations where there have to be two incomes.  But if debt is holding back that dream of a one income family, that is fixable.  That you can change.  Not by necessarily finding a better job.  That can help, but if the problem isn't fixed at 30,000, it won't be fixed at 50,000.  It will just be a bigger problem.   No, you change your circumstances by working hard at paying it off and then keeping it off.  Once that is paid off you can say in  the words of William Wallace (okay if I have to tell you who he was we have problems.  Think Braveheart)

FREEEEEEEEEEEDDOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!

Dare I dream?

DH and I are once again embarking on an adventure.  An adventure in Financial Peace University. We have taken the classes before, tried and failed.  BUT!  We are going once again.  Our debt isn't astronomical, but any debt (even the "good debt") is contrary to God's word.  "Neither a borrower or a lender be" isn't just a line from Hamlet, but comes from the book of Proverbs.  We have over the years seemed to spend our tires around baby step #1.  The saving of the initial $1000 for an emergency fund.  During the last FPU classes we managed to save the thousand dollars twice and it was spent twice.  The Government (bless their heart NOT) took it the first time, and then household things like AC going out, car repairs etc, took it the last time.  We get a bit nervous getting excited about this step because once we say out loud that we have that step accomplished, something happens to take it away.  So forgive me if I don't update things too loudly.  We are moving right along is all I will say.  Barring any unforeseen circumstances (Good Lord willin and the creek don't rise) we will have my DH's student loan paid off by 9/14.  Then we will tackle a credit card.  My hope is to have both the student loan and this one credit card paid off by the end of the year.
Funny thing debt.  If you have a good credit score you can get more of it.  Hmmm  I am beginning to realize that maybe I don't want any more debt.  Whatcha think?
***pause here*** wish you guys could really hear this.  Knight in shining Armour, Rubic, and Einstein are in Einsteins room playing "little big planet" and singing Bohemian Rhapsody.  Yea.  Interesting goings on at the frugal maven ranch.

Anyway, back to my original topic.  Want to know an interesting tidbit?  Larry Burkett once said that Americans could live off of minimum wage if it wasn't for debt.  I have found this to be true for us.  In order to keep us motivated I made up a "Dream Budget".  What our budget would look like with no debt.  Not even a Mortgage.  We could live off of what I make part time.  Dh's response to this is "Okay I'll just retire then".  Uh no!  LOL.   But at my age, to think of going into retirement in 15 years with no debt, no mortgage, would be a fantastic thing.  It is the best retirement plan in my opinion.  WOW.  So dare I dream this dream?      I have to at least try.