Saturday, August 31, 2013

Life is on hold for now...

I would love to be able to impart some tip I learned or antic I attempted, but for now I am holding down the fort.  My husband and two sons have left to go to Fla.  They are due home today.  I can't wait to see them, but the reunion is bittersweet.  You see he left last week to go and say his final goodbyes to his mom.  He wanted to get there to spend time with her before it was too late and allow the grandsons to see her as well.  I am so glad he had that opportunity.  My heart hurts for him and his siblings.  I am a daughter in law and so I have no clue what they are going through; facing the possible loss of both parents in a 6 month time period.  It is hard enough, I imagine, losing a parent, but both....I can't imagine what that must feel like.  My husband returns home for now and the next trip he and I take to Florida will be to attend the funeral.  It is a sad day.  I wish I could have gone with him, but finances wouldn't allow it. 


Always composed; I never saw her lose her cool.  She is the quintessential lady.  When my husband (before he was my husband) and I first moved in together (yes when we were heathens lol.); we tried to keep it from her because we thought she would disapprove.  His parents were in a different state so it should be easy right?  No.  The first time I met her was after we had moved in together.  We went to see them for Christmas.  Anyway, she knew.  I think she knew right off.  She never said a word  about it.  She just asked me if I had a nativity scene.  I said I did.  She said it was nice to know her son had one now.  Nothing else.  That was all, but we knew then the jig was up.  SO I guess it wasn't surprise when we told her I was expecting a few months later.  Before we were married.  Still composed, supportive, loving, kind.  We married very soon after.  LOL.  She was there when Einstein was born.  I was out of it so didn't realize it until the next day when she thanked me for letting her stay.  Surprise!   I regret that I had a little chip on my shoulder then.  I was immature and expected judgment and so projected it from her.  She never gave me judgment, just love, kindness, and support.  Over the years we would have long phone conversations, or talks while we were visiting.  I realized long time ago that she always accepted me as family and for that I am eternally grateful.  About 10 ish years ago she started ending her phone conversations with "I Love You".  It was and still is one of my favorite memories.

She loved her children, and grandchildren.  She loved family.  She is truly the matriarch of her family.  She has experienced joy and pain through her 89 years, and she has handled it all with grace and poise.  While no one lives a perfect life, and I know she made mistakes as well.  But the woman I knew in the past 20 years has inspired me.  I will be forever grateful for the influence she had on me to help make me into the woman I am today. 

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